DNA Part 10
The sky was a bleak gray that day. The chill of fall was starting to set in foreshadowing the outcome of my talk with Adrian. I watched from my window as people braved the unusually strong winds that had inhabited the campus. For some reason, I felt the need to be all put together that day. I picked out my best cardigan and took the tag off a new scarf. I was trying to take attention away from my treachery with a bit of flash.
I was using the old peacock move to distract him.
Before leaving Rory’s room that morning, I told him to give me some time to process the situation. Class was about 30 minutes away making my process all but obsolete. He sent me a text message right as I set out for class.
From Rory: If you choose this other guy, although I don’t know why you wouldn’t choose me, I will respect your decision. We can still hang out I hope.
To Rory: You’re making this harder jerk. Stop being cool about this. I’ll talk to you later.
From Rory: I’ll take that as a yes bubba!
I put my phone on silent after that last message to avoid any distractions. I wanted, no, I needed to focus on what I was going to say to Adrian. It was The End of Days. The walk to class felt more like a slow creep toward the edge of a pirate’s plank. I was bound and gagged by my need to be honest.
Ignoring my surroundings in this mental daze made it certain that I arrived to class super early. I waited outside the room for another professor to finish his lecture. As I sat next to the door with my eyes closed, I attempted to clear my head. I had never had anyone to be unfaithful to, so this made my first misstep the hardest. I really didn’t want to chalk it all up to hormones or alcohol. I wanted to be able to relay my feelings and receive understanding in return. Just as the fog in my head started to clear, the door of the classroom opened and students started to pour out in all directions. The next 50 minutes were actually some of the worst of my entire life.
I took my seat on the front row waiting for class to start. The room started to fill up spontaneously with only a few students still absent as our professor set up. Then Adrian walked in and my heart jumped out of my chest. He winked at me as he passed by, and I lowered my head in guilt. Adrian knew something was wrong and my phone started to glow continuously in my hand under the table. I didn’t have to read any message to know what they all said.
You dirty stinking whore you cheated on me! Didn’t you! I hate you! Go to hell you fat fuck!
I was too afraid to verify my colorful predictions for the messages, so I sent the response: we need to talk after class. That one message ended the barrage of messages which were surely all questions. I could feel his eyes piercing my soul from the back of the room after that point. Each minute seemed to triple in length that day. I missed every question that the professor asked. I was off my game! Then the clock read :50 and it was all over. I motioned to Adrian letting him know to stay inside the room. The professor left with no concerns about us lingering, and I closed the door seconds after he exited the room. The moment had finally come.
Adrian swiftly wrapped his arms around me holding on for a full minute. I pulled away and the confession began.
Adrian: A little cloak and dagger for you. What is wrong? I haven’t seen you in days.
Me: Just give me a second to find the words.
Adrian: You can tell me anything. We haven’t been dating that long, but it feels like years….
I just couldn’t watch his lips move anymore, so I just blurted it out.
Me: I slept with someone else!
Me: A girl!
Me: And…..
Me: It was a girl that I barely knew.
Adrian: What! Well that is unexpected.
Me: And…..
Adrian: Hold on! It is okay.
Me: You mean you’re not mad?
Adrian smiled as he gave his reasoning behind his lack of anger. I was not smiling at all.
Adrian: Of course not! I cannot compete with the female anatomy. How could I be mad at you for exploring your sexual identity.
Me: So, it is okay for me to sleep with women and not men?
Adrian: No! I didn’t say that you!
Me: Oh. Please explain to me what is happening right now because I thought this was the end of you and I.
Adrian: Well, it is not something I want happening again if we are going to try this whole boyfriend thing, but mistakes happen.
Adrian: Now that you’ve had boring old spam, you will enjoy steak even more!
Me: Fuck!
Me: Fuck!
Me: Fuck!
Me: Fuck me!
Adrian: What is wrong? I said it was okay. We’re just freshman.
Me: I am upset because I didn’t tell you the entire story!
Adrian: There is more?
Me: Yes, a lot more and now it will seem so much worse.
Adrian: Danny, just tell me the truth. I will understand. Sleeping with two girls is still okay. What could be worse than that?
He laughed and I grimaced. I knew eventually he would figure it out. I gave him a little help in the form of another question.
Me: Yeah, what could be worse than two girls…..one g.u.y….?
Suddenly, his face straightened and his muscles tensed. The look on Adrian’s face went from shock to full on anger. The next thing that happened was like a slow motion movie scene. Think The Matrix except without all the innovation, but better than the 2nd and 3rd movies. He balled up his fist and punched me square in the jaw. I stumbled back a few steps in total disbelief. He had actually just hit me in the face. No one had ever laid their hands on me in such an aggressively surprising way, so I swung back. I punched Adrian in the stomach causing him to keel over in pain. I thought that was the end of this nonsense when he reared back and tackled me to the ground. Stunned by his attack once again, I jabbed him in the side to reciprocate the action. We wrestled on the floor, knocking over desks and chairs until fatigue set in. Adrian rolled on top of me grabbing my arms, so that I could not move.
A week ago this position was something I dreamed about, now I could only feel dread setting in.
Adrian: Who was it? Who was this girl and this guy?
Me: Does it matter? It was a mistake. I made a mistake.
Adrian: Yes, it matters. I left for one weekend and you slept with another guy. It matters kid!
Me: It wasn’t planned. I got drunk. I was high!
Adrian: Excuses! Who was it? Tell me who it was or this is over!
Me: What do you mean over? You just told me you didn’t care about the girl.
Adrian: You know what…..
Adrian released my arms and started to collect his papers and pens that had spilled out of his backpack during our little brawl. Once again, I was speechless. I didn’t know whether to stop him or just lay there on the floor. Adrian’s back was turned away from me for a while. I wondered if he’d checked out of the situation, then I saw a drop of water fall onto his binder. He was crying. This wonderful guy was crying over me. My breath started to shorten, which usually precedes a panic attack. Thanks WebMD.
Adrian’s head spun around with tears in his eyes. I had started to lose all sense of my surroundings. My heart was beating so fast that I could barely keep my eyes open. As my eyes started to lower, I saw a lasting image of Adrian reaching out to catch my head before it hit the ground.
A minute or two later, I heard Adrian’s voice urging me to wake up. I had fainted. He was holding my head in his lap. I felt a tear fall to my face from Adrian’s eyes perched directly above me.
Adrian: First you cheat on me then you try to make me feel bad by having a mini heart attack!
Me: I’m sorry.
Adrian: Don’t be sorry. I’m glad you’re okay. I was about to call for help.
Me: I just got a little dizzy.
Adrian: Traumatic events can do that to ya!
Me: It was because I knew you were hurt by all this.
Adrian: Yeah…..then why did you do it in the first place.
Me: I don’t know.
Adrian: You know. Is it over between us?
Me: That is up to you.
Adrian: Who was this guy that made you feel like it was okay?
Me: Adrian, it doesn’t matter it is over. It was a one time thing.
Adrian: The fact that you won’t tell me who it was tells me that they mean something to you.
Me: It is not like that, it just won’t add anything to the situation.
Adrian started to leave and I knew that if I didn’t tell him now it was really over.
Me: It was a Beta!
Adrian: A beta? Who?
Me: Rory King….
I could see the wheels in Adrian’s head start to turn.
Adrian: The guy from all the freshman studies classes!
Adrian: The douche-bag who is always saving the Betas from expulsion!
Adrian: It happened at the Beer GALA didn’t it!
Adrian: You are a real piece of work!
Me: Adrian it didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I felt horrible right after it.
Adrian: You should have felt horrible before it happened.
Adrian began to run out of the room.
Me: Wait, where are you going?
Adrian: Doesn’t matter…..
I took chase after him yelling down the hallway. I had never ran so fast in my life, but I still couldn’t keep up with his sprinter’s body. I watched as he ran across the quad in a frenzy to get as far away from me as he could.
I returned to the classroom to get my backpack along with correcting the destruction our fight had caused only to see my phone ringing on the floor. It was Rory calling, so I pushed decline.
I sat down in a desk not really knowing what my next move would be. I laid my head down as my eyes started to water. I was so worried about having my own heart broken and failed to realize that I could potentially be the one to break a heart. From that day on, nothing between Adrian and I was quite the same.
To be continued…...
*Each post in this series will be accompanied by a song that sums up this part of the story. So go listen to it!
Note: This part of the story contains a scene depicting violence between a couple. In no way does VerbalDanger.com condone or accept this type of behavior. WE have chosen to present this story in its purest form to convey the good and bad reality that comes with relationships in general. However, if you feel that you are in a situation where you are a victim of violence in or outside of the home please seek professional help as soon as possible.
-Danny Bell
